Monday 23 May 2016

Hashtag Monday Memories - Hashtag A Steve Rant

For any newcomers to the blog, Steve is a recurring character who likes to rant to his long-suffering friend Johnny about the little things in life. Here is an example, and here is another

For audio click here 
“Hey look at this,” Johnny held up his phone to show Steve a photo.
“Where the hell did you get that from?”
“My mum sent it to me the other day, she was going through her old snaps.” Johnny said.
“Jesus, we must have been, what? Twenty, twenty-one?” Steve said.
 “Younger, nineteen I think. What did we look like?”
“We were cool,” Steve said. “Or at least I was. You on the other hand.”
“At least I wasn’t trying so hard.” Johnny countered.
“I wasn’t trying. It was all natural. Anyway you shouldn’t be showing me that today.” Steve said. Johnny noticed that he’d assumed his rant pose. He took a deep breath; he may as well ask. “Why not?”
“Well it’s not Thursday.” Steve took a mouthful of beer.
“And?”
“Well have you noticed how our lives, especially online, are ruled by alliteration. You can’t show me an old photo on a Monday. You have to keep old photos for Thursdays, because that’s hashtag throwback Thursday. On Monday you have to motivate me, hashtag Monday motivation or go crazy; hashtag Monday madness. Cleverness is Wednesday, hashtag Wednesday wisdom, and funny stuff is Friday, hashtag Friday Funny. Although if you can’t wait, you can hashtag Wednesday wit.”
“And Tuesday,” Johnny said, wishing he hadn’t.
“Tuesday is the day you give good advice or a silly video; hashtag Tuesday tip, hashtag Tuesday treat.”
“And you point is?”
“Well, when did the world get so alliterative? Why can’t we do things we want to when we want to? What if I’ve got something funny to say on a Tuesday or need motivating on a Thursday?”
“Steve, they are not hard and fast rules. There are no internet police waiting to pounce on any non-alliterative tweet.” Johnny couldn’t even believe he was saying this.  
“I know that, but people follow them like they are set in stone. Do you know what I saw the other day? Hashtag midrift Monday was trending on Twitter. I clicked on it and there were hundreds of pictures of women’s bellies. When did people get so easily led? What if I started one topless Tuesday, would people join in?”
“Ah that’s a different point,” Johnny pointed out. “But it’s community isn’t it. People like to feel part of it. And it means their posts will might reach a wider audience.”
“But surely you’d reach a wider audience if you stand out from the crowd, not follow it.”
“I don’t think it works like that, Steve.” Johnny said. “And anyway I can show you this photo today.”
“Why?” Steve asked.
“Well, hashtag Monday Memories.” Johnny looked rather pleased with himself.
“How about hashtag Monday My pint is empty.” Steve said, waving his glass in front of Johnny’s face.

Johnny got up, collected the empties and headed to the bar.


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