Wednesday 20 February 2013

C35


‘What’s that?’ Eric looked in amazement at the thing that Molly had put on the table.
‘It’s a Siemens C35.’
‘Well I can see that but what the bloody hell are you doing with it?’ He picked the archaic phone up and twirled it round in his hand. Probably only 14 years old but already more out-dated than Paul Daniel’s magic trick.
‘I told you my phone is dead, that’s why I am on a new number.’
‘And this one works?’
‘No Eric I am carrying it around as an accessory of course it bloody works.’
‘Where’s on earth did you get it?’
Carphone Warehouse I think, back in 2000.’
‘No I mean now.’
‘Back of my draw, it’s my emergency phone.’
‘Jesus, so what happened to the old phone?’
‘Well, I dropped it in the bath.’
‘Shit! Your lovely, shinny, new Galaxy cleverer than Professor Brian Cox smart phone? You dropped it in the bath?' Molly nodded.
 'You muppet!’
‘It’s completely fucked.
‘What were you doing with it in the bath?’
Molly blushed a colour so red Eric thought she was going to burst.
‘Tell me, tell me.’ Eric was bouncing on his seat desperate for the gossip but Molly stayed quiet.
‘Have you tried putting it in rice?’ He asked eventually realising that he wasn’t going to get anything out of his friend.
‘In rice? Why?’
‘Apparently it dries the phone, the rice absorbs the moisture. Same principle as putting rice in a salt pot.’
‘Really?’
‘Yeah, but I’ve never tried it cos I haven’t tried to take naked photos of myself in the bath.’
Molly blushed again. Had Eric hit the jackpot?
‘Cooked rice?’ she managed to say despite her embarrassment.
‘No, dry rice.’ Eric said his voice heavy with sarcasm.
‘I think I only have risotto rice at home, Will that do?’
‘Any rice I think.’
‘Well, okay I’ll try it.’
The next day Eric was sitting in a café drinking a latte, minding his own business, his super duper Steve Jobs inspired phone buzzed signalling he had a new message.
‘Thank you, thank you, to show my appreciation I’ll send you the photo I took when I dropped the phone. Wait a sec.’
Eric smiled, he didn’t really think the rice would work so he was amazed it had. He was excited about the impending arrival of the ‘bath’ picture. His imagination raced.
30 seconds later the phone buzzed again. Eric grabbed it from the table and slid his finger across the screen to view the pic.
In front of his eyes were three yellow rubber ducks bobbing merrily in foamy bathwater.


2 comments:

  1. hehhehe.... I have heard the British like to have those rubber toys in the bath, even if they are not children any more:):) so it's true!:)

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  2. I would like to inform you that your story had a tremendous impact on my life today: I was having a bath thinking of those ducks and I put some feminine wash on my head instead of the hair lotion!

    ReplyDelete