Gareth’s Short Story Poem Podcast 4 Unromantic Lyrics.

As I am away this week and might not have time to write a story  I am doing something a bit different. I’m sharing with you my short story poems. A short story poem is a sort of combination of a poem and a short story. I am not really a poet but I hope these make you smile. However, today’s are a little different, they are called unromantic lyrics. Watch the video to find out more. 

Unromantic Lyrics

Don't go changing to try to please me,
You know you're never going to be my type. 

So put on your red shoes,

and nip down the shops to buy me some fags.

And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like
Oh where's the remote, the game's about to start.

 Wherever I lay my hat,
 you'll complain that I haven't put it away. 

You hit me once
I hit you back
You gave a kick
I gave a slap
You smashed a plate
Over my head

then our neighbours called the police 

Could it be magic oh

No, it’s animal instinct that will soon wear off.

Leaving you wondering

what you saw in her

in the first place.

Find day 1 here day 2 here day 3 here day 4 here and day 5 here 

Short Story Poem Podcast 3

As I am away this week and might not have time to write a story  I am doing something a bit different. I’m sharing with you my short story poems. A short story poem is a sort of combination of a poem and a short story. I am not really a poet but I hope these make you smile.

My Client gives me the creeps

I hate the way he looks at me

Like I’m some chocolate factory.

He’s not listening to my financial advice.

He’s thinking that my tits look nice.

Me

It’s flowing

And I’m positively glowing

And going

To the toilet

A lot!

The Jobless Trilogy

Andrex

Why have I got these qualifications?

I can’t find any justification.

My certificates don’t impress a soul.

I’m trading them in for toilet roll.

Neighbours (this is the name of an Australian soap opera) 

No future no prospects and no hopes

We’re just palmed off with Aussie soaps.

McDonalds

Three years in college to learn to say;

Would you like fries with that?

Have a nice day.

Hatred

I hate you

she said

but the smile

said something else.

Find day 1 here day 2 here day 3 here day 4 here and day 5 here

Short Story Poem Podcast 2

As I am away this week and might not have time to write a story  I am doing something a bit different. I’m sharing with you my short story poems. A short story poem is a sort of combination of a poem and a short story. I am not really a poet but I hope these make you smile.

Socks

I take my shoes off

After a hard days work.

My feet breathe,

My girlfriend doesn’t

Stereotypes

He asked me about stereotypes

I couldn’t be bother to have a serious conversation

So I said I had a Sanyo.

I’m in Love with my financial adviser.

Was it love or just infatuation?

While she sorted out my superannuation

my mind wasn’t on financial affairs

I was thinking about her underwear.

Fact or Opinion

We’re minions

slaves.

Waves of oppression

wash over us

Like a toilet flush.

A rush of water

that oughta

rouse us from out stupor.

But doesn’t.

Gentle touches

A shiver

a river of

passion

dashing 
through

my body.

Find day 1 here day 2 here day 3 here day 4 here and day 5 here 

Gareth’s Short Story Poem Podcast 1

As I am away this week and might not have time to write a story  I am doing something a bit different. I’m sharing with you my short story poems. A short story poem is a sort of combination of a poem and a short story. I am not really a poet but I hope these make you smile.

Wearing Shorts

I sneeze

a wet breeze

hits my knees

Stereotypes

I asked her about stereotypes.

She replied she had a Sanyo.

I knew we had no future.

Let us eat cake.

We’re fed lies

with fries

and  football.

We’re Game of Thrones

drones.

Let us eat cake,

if only we could afford it.

The Dilemma

A fishnet top

and no bra

meant her perky breasts

were clearly visible

My feminist side said

don’t look

My masculine side said

don’t look

away.

The Zipper

undoing the zipper

on the back of your dress

and thinking yes!

as that dress

slips to the floor.

Find day 2 here day 3 here day 4 here and day 5 here