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There wasn't even a flicker of recognition in her eyes, not a smidgen. I'd been hanging back; half wanting her to see me, half not. Eventually, she caught my eye and smiled, but it wasn't a warm, 'how the devil are you after all this time' smile, it was a 'dead in the eyes, I'm being polite' smile. I shouldn't have been surprised. I mean it had been a year and she’d probably tied the memory into a little ball and buried it deep.
Still, I'd hoped for something a little more, but I can't blame her. I'd been a fool. You’ll never believe what I did. I’d wrapped up a sheep's heart and sent it in the post! What was I thinking? I can only imagine the look on her face when she peeled off the colourful paper to see that dark, bloody organ in a freezer bag. Thank Christ I’d attached the note saying I love you, just to soften the blow. I was so in the moment, I genuinely thought it was a token of my love, but for her, well, it was a rotting piece of offal. She left me soon after that. Really broke my heart she did. But you know, if she kissed me now, I think she'd fool me again. Damn, I mustn’t start thinking like that, I’ve got to get this year’s heart to someone special.
George was the first person I saw when I walked into the party. I tried to pretend I didn't recognise him, but his eyes were like the fucking Mona Lisa, so, in the end, I smiled at him while hoping he wouldn't come over. I had been quite keen on him at the time. He was cute in a metrosexual kind of way and he certainly had good moves. But what kind of freak sends their lover a fucking heart through the post, A fucking heart in a freezer bag and red robin wrapping paper. To be honest, if he'd whispered he loved me after sex, it would have been awkwardly too soon, so the grand gesture was certainly misplaced even without the blood and gore. I gave it away, of course. I didn’t even wait twenty-four hours. I was straight down the dogs’ home with it and I haven’t seen him since. Hmm, he looks nice. I wonder if I were to make a move, could I fool him again.
And of course if you were not sure, here are the originals.