She looked over the balcony at the floor below and watched him talking with his friends. Animated, aggressive, forceful he sat low in his chair, legs akimbo. His Mohican hair a statement, his eyes burned a ‘don't mess with me’ look. He twirled a pen in his fingers as he spoke, the notebook in front of him chocka with ideas. Louise felt her knees go weak as she watched his alpha-male display.
She tried to remain in the conversation with her
friends but it was easier said than done as a small blush of excitement ran
down her spine as it always did whenever she saw him. She doubted he had ever
even noticed her, and if he had only in an aggressive class warfare type way. She was just a pretty little rich kid,
porcelain features, perfect hair, perfect teeth. She had seen the contempt with
which he had looked at her ‘crowd’; she'd seen that look 100 times before from
100 different working class heroes; first one up against the wall come the
revolution.
She hated the cliched nature of it, a posh girl's
desire for a bit of rough, that something that was always just that little bit
out of reach. It was so Bronte. But she couldn't help herself. She wondered what
James would think if he knew that every time she let his metrosexual hands
wander on her skin she closed her eyes and thought of Mohican. She didn't make
love to James any more, he was just the conduit for her fantasy, but when she
opened her eyes she was always disappointed to see his floppy Ivy League
haircut and not a rough and ready tuff of hair.
The conversation went on around her but she was
lost in her thoughts. As he looked up at her, she realised her furtive glances
had turned into obvious stares. He caught her looking, curled his top lip and
displayed his middle finger.
‘Such an oik’ said James who'd seen the display of
working-class machismo. ‘Let's go.’
‘Yes’said Louise picking up her bag and trying to
sound like the unfurling finger had not just stabbed her in the heart.
And now, having in mind yesterday's discussion, is that cheating or not? When you only fantasize?
ReplyDeleteHmm I think not personally :-)
ReplyDeleteI am in two minds about it.... on one hand, it seems not but on the other - emotional, spiritual and intellectual intimacy is the most important for me in a relationship and from this point of view thinking about someone else intensly may be called cheating....
ReplyDeleteit is!
Delete