Dear Gareth,
Thank you very much for your email, which we
read with interest.
I and the rest of the band are sorry that you
do not like our music but let me assure you that I do indeed write the lyrics
myself and they are not written by my children Apple or Moses.
As for your Coldplay Theory it did give us a
good laugh but I am afraid we can neither confirm or deny whether it is true.
Let me turn now to the main subject of your
email. We would like to state for the record that no birds have died in the
making of our songs. The whole of Coldplay are committed to the preservation of
all winged creatures and feel the mass murder of parrots would be harmful to
the planet’s ecosystem. Yes you do have a point that we talk about breaking a
butterfly but this is purely metaphorical and not a call to action for our
fans.
As for the chorus I think you should listen
again more carefully. We actually sing she dreamed of para para para dise every
time she closed her eyes . Admittedly in the radio
edit is it not as clear as we would have liked it to be, but let me assure you
that at no time do we sing a parrot dies every time she closed her eyes as you claim. Therefore, we would ask you not to contact the Royal Society for
the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals or the Royal Society for the Protection of
Birds, as there really is no need.
I hope this email has allayed your fears of
mass parrot destruction.
Yours sincerely
Chris
Chris Martin out of Coldplay
For legal reasons I have to make it clear that this was written by me and not by the lead singer of Coldplay, or the person who was one year older than me in school or the cricketer who represents New Zealand or indeed any other Chris Martin.
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