Gabby had a problem, ever since she was first pregnant she had given her baby a voice. Like any mother she spoke to the bump in her tummy but not many mothers had the baby answering back. Gabby was one of the country’s finest ventriloquists, she had a range of puppets and voices and it seemed completely natural to give a her lovely bump a lovely voice. Her husband had told her to stop it, but she couldn’t. For one thing it was good practice for after her maternity leave,‘just keeping my hand in’ she’d say to her poor hubby. It continued after the baby was born too. Again like any mother, Gabby spoke to her beautiful baby boy, but instead of the ‘oh yes you do, you like it don’t you,’ baby talk, her ‘baby’ spoke back intelligently. She’d have long conversations with the baby often making herself laugh. Her husband hated it but she kept going.
But now she wished she’d listened to her husband. Now little Luke had
his own voice, he could say words and make lovely attempts at words, thrilling his father and grandparents, but not Gabby. Most
mothers would be overjoyed at the progress he was making and the cuteness of
his efforts. But Gabby was distraught. Luke sounded nothing like the voice she
had created for him, every time he spoke she would recoil at the strangeness of
his voice. She had a big problem, she didn’t recognise the voice so didn't respond when he was talking to her, but more than that, she was beginning to hate her own child.
Oh yeah.. women are beasts. Apart from playing with men unscrupulously, they can even hate their own children :-D
ReplyDeleteyou know, I almost changed this at the last minute to the husband being the ventriloquist .... maybe I should have left out the pronouns :-)
ReplyDeleteWomen are evil because men made them that way:-)
ReplyDeleteI think I'll mention this blog on Twitter with the #feministmovement hastag :-D
DeleteYes, women unite! :-)
DeleteAnd have you seen The Mating Ritual ?:-)
DeleteThe Mating Ritual? Just checked it out :-) Interesting. But that's not the way it really works, is it? ... :-D
DeleteWell, you can't always hide behind the absence of pronouns :-)
ReplyDeleteKnowing the author of this blog, I think he might now write the story from the baby' point of view:)
ReplyDeleteNo plans to do that but there might be a part two.
DeleteDear author:
ReplyDeleteAs walk a mile in mommy's shoes is not easy even more if you are not a mum..
..I suggest you a mix: a "vertigo 3" story's beginning with "But dad!".. with a mix of mum's thingamajigs that makes a 'boy with no nouns' starts to talk :-)
I would also make this story compulsory reading for ELT trainees. Why? To show how learners feel. Learners often do their best but their teachers hate them and think they are stupid because they are not able to use correctly what they've taught them :-)
ReplyDeletehow do you know that teachers think their students are stupid?.. Oh! so you're one of those teachers!
DeleteHey be nice to each other. I think it is a very brave comment to make. I think as teachers it can be frustrating when our students don't make the progress we wished they did. There's nothing wrong with admitting that or even thinking that :-) For me it is nice to know that other teachers have similar frustrations.
DeleteBut also this might have been written by a student :-)
Yes that was a rude comment to write. This is a very wise and universal story. Poor Gabby is just a figure you can substitute anone for: a woman, a man, a daugrupowaniahter, son, lover , teacher, student,boss.... Anyone who creates an ideal picture of someone else in their head and gets angry when this picture sometimes appears to be different and cannot accept it.
DeleteI'd like to think not rudeness just misunderstanding :-) and thank you for the nice rest of the comment :-)
DeleteDefinitely misunderstanding. If you think about it, the comment (the 'rude' one) doesn't really make sense because the metaphor about learners was used to express empathy with all the 'imperfect' creatures, not to express mockery or despise ....
DeleteHow do I know that teachers think their students are stupid? Because once I was a student ...and because I hear some teachers say so. And yes, I proudly confess I'm a teacher :-)
ReplyDeleteGood point for teacher's teacher for someone whose students are.....teachers!
Delete..As being parents, sometimes we have forgotten that we were once children..
Thanks for answering!
And..as I'm not and never be a teacher, I hope to be always a learner.. I'm slow.. you know.. maybe, one of those learners ;-)