Saturday 7 January 2017

Wi-Fi - A Steve Rant

For audio click here 
“Look at this,” Steve said turning his phone around to show his friend. 
“Happy New Year to you too,” Johnny replied, setting down with his beer and picking up the phone. 
“What is it?”
“It’s the Wi-Fi networks available to me in my flat,” Steve said. 
“Oh my god, that’s the most boring thing you’ve ever said. Your point is?” Johnny took a swig of Guinness. 
“Well, it’s dumb, isn’t it? It’s a relatively small block of flats. yet each one of us has our own Wi-Fi signal, our own TV contract, our own phone in the same way that each of us has our own toothbrush. Why the hell don’t we share?”
“You wanna share your toothbrush?” 
“Don’t be a smart arse it doesn’t suit you. That’s the very point, it isn’t a toothbrush. There’s no reason why we don’t share. It is not like it is unhygienic; we’re not gonna catch some dreaded lurgy.” 
“I’m not so sure with the sites you visit,” Johnny smiled, Steve didn’t. 
“It’s a bloody racket. Each of us is forking out thirty-odd quid for Wi-Fi when we could be sharing the cost. Somehow the telecom companies have made us treasure our own signals like we treasure our underwear. We’ve all got to have our own. It’s become an extension our person space.  Why don’t I cancel my account and then knock on my neighbour’s door and ask if I could buy some of his off him or why don’t we all get together and have one router, one signal and just share?”
“You have a point, but would the signal be strong enough?” 
“Well, you can get those signal boosters can’t you, and if we were chipping in together we’d get the maximum speed.”
“The other problem is security, isn’t it?” Johnny said. “Would your personal data be safe if you had an open wireless network.” 
“I have a theory,” Steve said. Johnny looked scared. “That internet security issues are a construct of the internet companies to scare us off doing exactly this.” 
“You wouldn’t say that if it was your identity stolen.” 
“It’s the same with phones.” Johnny was quite relieved that Steve had changed the subject. “I have unlimited call and text minutes on my phone but if anyone asked me if they could use my phone to make a call, I’ll tell them to bugger off. Why? Because it is mine.”
“Or, cos they’d run off with your phone.” 
“Well there is that, but you get the point, things that could easily be shared, we hoard for ourselves and get protective over and big businesses are laughing all the way to their own banks.” 
“You know what Steve, I think for once, you’ve just made a serious point. Now it’s your round.” 

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